The Fat Tooth

Costco pizza, how I love thee.

I had a scare recently.

I came home from work with a craving of such intensity it almost felt tangible. It started in my gut and reached it’s way into my brain (and no, these were not just hunger pangs). I’d never felt anything like it before. It was like the craving took over me entirely. I had an out of body experience as I watched myself careen around the kitchen in a frenzy. With the focus and drive I brought to the task, I probably could have learned a new language or come up with a solution to world peace. Instead, I baked lemon bars.

And then I ate half the pan.

I didn’t even wait for it to cool down enough to sprinkle powdered sugar on it. In a daze over the destruction I had done to the baked goods, I crawled into bed next to my husband. “Baby,” I said tugging at his arm.
“Mmmph,” he sleepily replied.
“I think I’m pregnant,” I said.
“What, really?” he said, alert and awake now.
I explained to him about how I had an intense craving, the likes of which I’d never felt before. And how I had stayed up to bake for 2 hours and then had eaten HALF A PAN OF LEMON BARS in one go.
“Oh baby,” he said, with sleep creeping into his voice again, “don’t try to blame that on pregnancy.”

He was right (although I realized that only after a couple intense minutes of screeching). I was not pregnant (and just to clarify, I am NOT pregnant. I repeat, NOT PREGNANT. I just like wearing billowing clothing), but I do have quite the predilection for pastries.

But now I realize it’s not just the sweets I crave, I like savory, too. My husband and I have been known to have slices of cheese pizza. As a snack.

Right after eating dinner.

Of the past nine entries I’ve written, five have been about food. And when I cook/bake, me and Paula Deen share the same sentiment: more butter is better.

I don’t just have a sweet tooth; I have a fat tooth.

Why does fat taste so good? According to this article by Sara Elliott, turns out there may actually be taste buds for fat. So besides salty, bitter, sour and sweet flavors, humans can taste savory and fat flavors. She argues there’s an advantage to being able to taste and enjoy the flavor of fat. “For most of the history of mankind, overeating hasn’t been much of a problem, but starvation has. Fat is easily converted into energy, and fats are also among the most calorie-dense dietary options on the planet, so a predisposition for eating fat might have meant the difference between surviving a harsh winter and perishing before spring,” Elliott writes.

I’m starting to feel more guilty about it though, especially as I’m seeing all these distressing reports on obesity, especially this disturbing one that obese teens can have heart damage without showing any signs. If it happens to teens, it can happen to adults.

Also, fat seems to act in the same way as drugs do, in that the more you consume fatty foods, the less sensitive you become to the taste of fat, and need higher amounts of fat to obtain the same pleasure as before, according to an article by Gary Wenk.

I think I’ll try to write about healthier things in the future, like broccolli.

Besides, it tastes really good with melted cheese on top.

Jammie Karlman is the entertainment editor for the Chico Enterprise-Record. Contact her at buzz@chicoer.com. Follow her on Twitter @JammieKarlman