by Joe Schmoe
Wouldn’t God be happy if just a small percentage of our religious order acted as exterminators? They would be the good people sworn to eliminate the rabble in the world…the rabble being the people NOT like us. You know the kind, the ones who don’t believe as we do! And we’re right cause God said so and that means they are completely wrong. If we killed off those wrong types, its not like we’re going to miss them. Heck, killing them is actually wonderful thing! I hate th…I mean, God hates them… because they are unbelievers and they are obstructions to the global acceptance of Christianity that God has ordained! Praise be to God Almighty!
Seems to me those courageous Christian exterminators would be God’s favorites. They would help the whole movement spread the word by force, fear and coercion. Become Christian or die, yep perfectly fair. And it also seems just as fair that He (God) would have a special payoff in Heaven for the slayers of those nasty infidels…why, I , uh…. Holy Scriptures Abraham! There is a voice coming right through my tin foil hat. . . wait, yes, there it is, it is God, no doubt about it, its God speaking to me please stand by for an important announcement and I will tell you what he is commanding us ALL to do:
“Attention my faithful…God speaking, I’ll give you 5 really hot babes in heaven if you will go kill somebody who doesn’t believe in our brand of religion and/or who offends my good name…but, wait, if you start killing infidels right now, I’ll double that offer and give you 5 more hot babes… for a total offer of 10, count them ten…really, really hot babes once you are in heaven! And wait…that’s not all! With this amazing limited time offer you will get a free get into Heaven Pass! No more waiting in those long lines just to find out if you are eligible to enter heaven. As one of my favorite’s you can just march right past that line and right up to St. Peter, no waiting!
But, this offer won’t last – you must act now! Remember, this is a limited time offer!
And if all that is still not enough…. the first “500 killers for Jesus” will also get a free gold door knob for your heavenly domicile absolutely free.
Tell a friend… tell a neighbor… but act now, heaven awaits! However, if you are for any reason not 100% satisfied you can come back to earth no questions asked or my name isn’t Beelza…er, I mean Jehovah!”
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Of course this is sheer lunacy. . .and its hard to imagine how anyone but a mentally defective person could fall for this crazy and immoral scheme. But, lets say they did! Well, you can bet the rest of the world would quickly turn against the Christians everywhere until they stopped this murderous idiocy! The argument against such evil in the name of God is obvious. However, if only a small fraction did it, it would still destroy the credibility of the whole Church… every Christian would bare some accountability.
Consider that it was only a small fraction of Nazi’s that acted as death camp exterminators, but it did not excuse the majority of Nazi’s who not directly involved with that fanatical sort of genocide. In this latter case, both groups, the non-violent Nazi’s and the killer Nazi’s, sought the same goal the global acceptance of Nazism. In this context it is hard to draw a distinction between Nazi killers and Nazi’s at large.
Can you draw any other inferences, any other examples come to mind? Feel free to write in and let us know.