A blonde is flying in a two-seater airplane with just the pilot.
He has a heart attack and dies. She, frantic, calls out a May Day.
“May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead. And I don’t know how to fly. Help me! Please help me!”
She hears a voice over the radio saying:
Thanks to Peggy for this one…
“This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I’ve had a lot of experience with this kind of problem.
‘Now, just take a deep breath. Everything will be fine! Now give me your height and position.”
She says, “I’m 5’4″ and I’m in the front seat.”
“O.K.” says the voice on the radio, “Repeat after me: Our Father, Who art in Heaven………”
LOL.
Here is another smile for Monday.
Catchy anti-Obama song points out his biggest faults.
http://www.ijreview.com/2012/07/10711-video-catchy-anti-obama-song-points-out-biggest-faults/
There was a beautiful young blonde who was going to a soda machine and she arrived there just before a business man coming to quench his thirst. She opened her purse and put in 50 cents, studied the machine a little, pushed a Diet Coke selection, and out came a Diet Coke which she placed on a counter by the machine.
Then she reached in her purse again and pulled out a dollar and inserted it in the machine. Studying the machine carefully, she pushed the button for Coke Classic and out came a Coke Classic and 50 cents change.
She immediately took the 50 cents and put it in the machine, studied it for a moment and pushed the Mountain Dew button. Out came a Mello Yello. As she was reaching into her purse again, the business man who had been waiting patiently for several minutes now spoke up.
“Excuse me Ms. but are you done yet?” She looked at him and indignantly replied: “Well Duhhh!, I’m still winning”
Nothing like a Ford Truck.
New Truck built by a company we didn’t bail out.
I bought a new Ford F250 Tri-Flex Fuel Truck.
Go figure, it runs on either hydrogen, gasoline, or E85.
I returned to the dealer yesterday because I couldn’t get the radio to
work.
The service technician explained that the radio was voice activated.*
“Nelson” the technician said to the radio.
The radio replied ‘”Ricky or Willie?”
“Willie!” he continued and “On The Road Again”
came from the speakers.
Then he said “Ray Charles! and in an instant
” Georgia On My Mind” replaced Willie Nelson.
I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I’d say
“Beethoven” I’d get beautiful classical music and if I said,
“Beatles” I’d get one of their awesome songs.
Yesterday, some guy ran a red light and nearly creamed
my new truck!! But I swerved in time to avoid him.
I yelled “A.. H.!”
Immediately the radio responded with, Ladies and gentlemen, The President of The
United States!
D–n I love this truck!!!…..
PEGGY…!!!!! ROFLMAO!!!!!
Love my BBF (Beautiful Blue Ford) with voice command! ;>